BC:AD

This was the moment when Before
Turned into After, and the future's
Uninvented timekeepers presented arms.
 
This was the moment when nothing
Happened. Only dull peace
Sprawled boringly over the earth.
 
This was the moment when even energetic Romans
Could find nothing better to do
Than counting heads in remote provinces.
 
And this was the moment
When a few farm workers and three
Members of an obscure Persian sect.
Walked haphazard by starlight straight
Into the kingdom of heaven.


U.A.Fanthorpe

God beyond all names

Just back from a marvellous Advent Triduum at the Kairos Center in South London, so many thanks to Sisters Agnes, Breda and Rose and their wonderful team.  Posting this because it is always played at Mass on the last day and can always reduce me to tears.  Sung by the marvellous Bernadette Farrell.

Hope beyond darkness

In rode the Lord of the Nazgul. A great black shape against the fires beyond he loomed up, grown to a vast menace of despair. In rode the Lord of the Nazgul, under the archway that no enemy ever yet had passed, and all fled before his face.

All save one. There waiting, silent and still in the space before the Gate, sat Gandalf upon Shadowfax: Shadowfax who alone among the free horses of the earth endured the terror, unmoving, steadfast as a graven image in Rath Dinen.

'You cannot enter here,' said Gandalf, and the huge shadow halted. 'Go back to the abyss prepared for you! Go back! Fall into the nothingness that awaits you and your Master. Go!'

The Black Rider flung back his hood, and behold! he had a kingly crown; and yet upon no head visible was it set. The red fires shone between it and the mantled shoulders vast and dark. From a mouth unseen there came a deadly laughter.

'Old fool!" he said. 'Old fool! This is my hour. Do you not know Death when you see it? Die now and curse in vain!' And with that he lifted high his sword and flames ran down the blade.


Gandalf did not move. And in that very moment, away behind in some courtyard of the City, a cock crowed. Shrill and clear he crowed, recking nothing of wizardry or war, welcoming only the morning that in the sky far above the shadows of death was coming with the dawn.

And as if in answer there came from far away another note. Horns, horns, horns. In the dark Mindolluin's sides they dimly echoed. great horns of the North wildly blowing. Rohan had come at last."

Chapter IV: The Siege of Gondor, The Return of the King

Friendship

Every idiot alive is on the roads today
Grey drizzle streaks the windows.  That windscreen wiper scrapes and squeaks
Going to be late.  My gritted teeth are giving me a headache.
I pull into the car park.  My colleague taps the window.
"I'll make coffee" she says.
"Haven't time." I growl.  She shakes her head at me and laughs.
"Two sugars in yours," she quips and walks away.
I mutter under my breath, stare at my phone.
A number starts to dial itself under my fingers. 
I nearly stop it...and then I don't.
A ring, two rings, three.
"It'll be the answerphone," I grumble, cradling the phone.
And then it isn't.  And my friend is in the car with me.
We don't say much.  Never do, really.
He makes a joke, I laugh.  Asks about my husband, mother, son.
We say - again - we must meet.  Try to not make it so long.
I ask about a mutual friend - the news not good.
We hold each other invisibly for a minute - a hug of many miles.
He says something kind, we both smile.  Say our goodbyes. Hang up.
Actually - it's not raining any more, is it?
My headache seems to have trickled away with the rain.
And I'm not truly late
I lock the car, walk into work.
That coffee she's made smells really good.

Words copyright Sister Tiberia 2017

Eternal and unchanging.....?

Or is it?

Just found this article again on the Wayback Machine - I thought it had gone completely.  A fascinating read for those who think the Roman Catholic Church has never altered its teaching on anything...

https://web.archive.org/web/20090817001701/http://homepage.ntlworld.com:80/pharseas.world/motoproprio.html#Infalible non-infalibility

Conversation between the Seven Deadlies

Wrote this particular bit of silliness a couple of years ago,  Definitely not to be taken seriously :)



Conversation Between The Seven Deadlies


"She's going on retreat again?"
"Yes boss."
Pride buried his head in his hands and looked through his interlinked fingers at the messenger.  "Now, tell me, Sloth, after last year's fiasco, didn't I give you the job of making sure she put off actually booking it until it was too late?"
"Hey, that wasn't my fault, boss.  I did make sure she put off booking it last year.  Those bloody nuns contacted her and said a space had come up.  I'd been working so hard on making her put off booking a retreat anywhere else and then they spoiled everything."
"Well, no use crying over spilt milk.  But it does make her significantly harder to handle for months after she comes back."
Envy looked over at Pride.  "How about trying for a good dose of Spiritual Pride this time?  That's always good for a laugh."
Pride grimaced.  "Tried that on her before.  It almost worked."
"Almost?"
"Retreat director was too good.  It got nipped in the bud."
Pride was clearly annoyed and Envy tactfully changed the subject.  "Well, we know it's a waste of time trying for Lust.  She's middle aged, married, busy job and has a kid.  Sloth is going to win over Lust every time.  I don't think it even counts as Sloth if she's too damn tired to do anything but fall into bed and sleep when she gets home at night.  Lust gave up on her years ago.  Said he was even getting bored with playing mind games to stop her noticing all the other sins and having hysterics about that one."
"I thought that always worked on Catholics."
"Used to work on her too.  But not these days."
"Guess that leaves Anger as the tried and tested first line of attack."
Anger looked sulky.  "Why do you all dump this on me all the time?"
Lust batted his eyelashes at Anger.  "Because you're so good at it?"
"Yes, but she's a depressive.  There's no real fun in getting them angry.  She flares up and then calms down again, then she gets depressed about it.  Used to at least manage to get her to be horrible to a few people before she calmed down, but these days that isn't working too well either."
"Was that after the first retreat?"
"Yes.  She carries this wretched stone with her.  Retreat director told her to keep it with her as a reminder that there were better ways to deal with things than throw stones.  She's still got the stupid thing."
"So she's carried it for three years and you haven't managed to get her to throw it at anyone yet?"
"Nope."
"Anger, you're losing your touch."
Anger growled at Lust.  "Anyway, Pride's isn't getting away with passing all the blame to the rest of us.  He managed the biggest mess of the lot, this year."
Gluttony looked curious.  "How so?"
Anger gave Gluttony a saccharine smile.  "Because she noticed he was there."
Greed blinked.  "She did?  I thought Pride was the one nobody ever recognised?"
Anger turned to Greed. "Another good retreat director had a chat with her."
"Those buggers have a lot to answer for."
Pride picked up a notebook.  "Anyway, time to stop the arguments and get a plan in place.  Greed, you've already given me a couple of ideas to work on.  Gluttony, you're a waste of space.  We aren't solving this one by trying to get her to take second helpings of chocolate cake.  We need something that'll affect everyone round her, not just her."
Envy nodded.  "That was where Pride and Anger had a good double act going for years.  Pride set her up, then when her pride got injured, Anger had a field day with it.  Then for the first time she actually mentioned Pride and Anger in confession, and said she thought all her other sins started there."
Anger kicked a chair leg moodily.  "She was right, of course.  But people aren't supposed to see that.  We've done a great job getting people to have hysterics over Lust but never notice me or Pride.  Bloody C. S. Lewis.  Anyone who reads his books starts to work this out.  If they get as far as reading Mere Christianity, he spells it all out for them in words of one syllable."
Pride tossed the notebook onto the table.  "Right, you've all got till October to come up with something.  I'll keep pushing the Spiritual Pride angle till then and hope some of it sticks.  Anger, you at least try to stop her apologising when she loses her temper, it undoes all the good work.  Greed and Gluttony, if you can't help with this then stop looking superior."
He looked wistful.  "I wish she'd never done that first retreat.  It feels like it's all gone downhill ever since."


Copyright Sister Tiberia 2015

Pride

I put quotes here often from things I have read.  Sometimes from surprising sources.  This comes from "Raiders of Gor", the sixth book in the Chronicles of Counter-Earth.  It was a very long sci-fi series and some of the books, especially the later ones, were seriously awful.  But there was the occasional gem.




"There was only one last obstacle," said Samos, "and neither of you, even now, fully understand it."

"What is that?" I asked.

"Your pride," he said. "that of both of you." 

He smiled. "When you lost your images of yourselves, and learned your humanity, in your diverse ways, and shame, you abandoned your myths, your songs, and would accept only the meat of animals, as though one so lofty as yourself must be either Priest-King or beast. Your pride demanded either the perfection of the myth or the perfection of its most villainous renunciation. If you were not the highest, you would be nothing less than the worse; if there was not the myth there was to be nothing." 

Samos now spoke softly. "there is something," he said, "between the fancies of poets and the biting, and the rooting and sniffing of beasts."

"What?" I asked.

"Man," he said.

John Norman - Raiders of Gor

Courbette - The Leap of Faith

Courbette - The Leap of Faith

Holding the lightest touch on the rein,
lifting the hocks with the gentlest flick of the whip,
God, marvelling at His creation,
calls upon it to leap.

Creation gathers strong muscles,
passes the moment of doubt and "I can't"
the memories of failure,
takes the breath that will launch him skywards,

leaps....

Creation touches down, snorting, sweating,
one eye already on He who holds the rein,
head tossing, sidling,
silently asking "Did I do well?"

God, bursting with pride,
runs a hand down the sweat-gleamed neck,
the freely offered apple ready in His other hand.
"Better than I dreamed possible."


Words copyright Sister Tiberia, 2017
Image - Colonel Podhajsky with Siglavy Brezovica in a courbette on the rein in 1955

He is risen

Christians, to the Paschal Victim
offer sacrifice and praise. 
The sheep are ransomed by the Lamb;
and Christ, the undefiled,
hath sinners to his Father reconciled.

Death with life contended:
combat strangely ended!
Life's own Champion, slain,
yet lives to reign.

Tell us, Mary:
say what thou didst see upon the way.

The tomb the Living did enclose;
I saw Christ's glory as He rose! 
The angels there attesting;
shroud with grave-clothes resting.

Christ, my hope, has risen:
He goes before you into Galilee.

That Christ is truly risen
from the dead we know.
Victorious King, Thy mercy show!

The Stations of The Cross (repost)

Any Catholic is familiar with the Stations of the Cross.  Every church we've ever been to has had them, the art work as varied as the churches themselves.

But this set I keep coming back to over and over - Mary Button's "Stations of the Cross - The struggle for LGBT equality"  I find the art work remarkable, and they can reduce me to tears over and over.

Before you judge them - look at them.  Read the commentary.

The artist herself says it best when she says:

"I believe that we can only begin to understand the meaning of the crucifixion when we take away our polished and shiny crosses and look for the cross in our own time, in our own landscape.

When we look for the crucified body of Christ in the stories of people on the margins of our societies, then we are able to live the Gospel and not simply read it."

You will find the whole series here at :

https://www.flickr.com/photos/believeoutloud/sets/72157632873157887/with/8513333475/

Friendship

These words are from St Francis de Sales, and were in my mind very much tonight while remembering a conversation with a priest who I think would allow me to call him friend, and who calls me the same.

"In a well-regulated monastery, perfection in the love of God is the common goal, that toward which all are supposed to tend; it is not necessary, therefore, to speak of it with a particular friend, lest by seeking in particular what ought to be sought in common, one pass from particulars to preferences and divisions.

But for those who live in the midst of the world and yet strive for true virtue, it is necessary to ally themselves to one another by a holy and sacred friendship through which they stimulate, assist and encourage each other toward good.

Those who walk on level ground do not need to hold hands, but those who climb steep and slippery roads need to hold on to each other in order to progress more securely.

Religious have no need of particular friendships, but those living in the world need them as a mutual strength and aid in the many difficult passages that have to be crossed."

"Any Woman" - Katharine Tynan

 I am the pillars of the house;
The keystone of the arch am I.
Take me away, and roof and wall
Would fall to ruin me utterly.

I am the fire upon the hearth,
I am the light of the good sun,
I am the heat that warms the earth,
Which else were colder than a stone.

At me the children warm their hands;
I am their light of love alive.
Without me cold the hearthstone stands,
Nor could the precious children thrive.

I am the twist that holds together
The children in its sacred ring,
Their knot of love, from whose close tether
No lost child goes a-wandering.

I am the house from floor to roof,
I deck the walls, the board I spread;
I spin the curtains, warp and woof,
And shake the down to be their bed.

I am their wall against all danger,
Their door against the wind and snow,
Thou Whom a woman laid in a manger,
Take me not till the children grow! 

Any Woman

Katharine Tynan

The Devil

A highly unfashionable topic.  Even though Pope Francis mentions him often.  In a 21st Century world, we think of the Devil as being a medieval fantasy, a subject for jokes, or simply non existent.

We forget that he isn't an entity with horns and a pitchfork.

St Ignatius of Loyola spoke often about the "good spirit" and the "bad spirit".  There's a good explanation of this here.

 http://www.ignatianspirituality.com/making-good-decisions/discernment-of-spirits/introduction-to-discernment-of-spirits

On retreat last year I found myself admitting (much to my surprise) in a conversation with a Sister who was also making the retreat, to an experience which I have told very few people about, but which I've been forced to consider a mystical experience in the absence of any other very good explanation.  As I was telling the story, even to my ears it seemed so impossible that I found myself backing off.  "I don't know," I said.  "I know it could just as easily have been my imagination, but..."

Her response was immediate.  "That's the evil spirit talking."  she said.

I thought a lot about that.  Her certainty that my sudden doubt, this voice that was saying to me that God only talks to "special" people came straight from the Devil.  It shook me a bit.  But just recently I found myself in what Ignatius called "spiritual desolation" - relating to something which is an area of my life which - after a lot of discernment and conversation with two good confessors, the Catechism and I have had to agree to differ on, because in a million years I will never be able to give "assent of will" to it.  Neither priest seemed to have any problem with this at all.  The problem is mine.  I come back to it, chew over it, get cross about it, then usually upset.  Over and over again.

Today, when I was starting down that road again, I heard Sister Caroline again in my head, as plain as day.

"That's the evil spirit talking."

I sat down and looked at what I was chewing over again.

"As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly." Proverbs 26;11, KJV


How many more times am I going to pummel the world until I get chapter and verse on something that isn't possible to get chapter and verse on?  What on earth is the point of having a conscience at all if not to give guidance when this sort of thing happens?  Why did I waste my time seeking out good spiritual advisors and talking to them about it if I was simply going to walk back into the same trap of despair again?  Is there anything that anyone could say to me that would actually stop me doing this to myself?  Over and over again?

Perhaps I ought to give the Devil points for a wily attack.  But this time, he doesn't win.  Thank you, Sister Caroline.  I owe you one.

Spotlight

Today I went to see the film "Spotlight" - the story of the Boston Globe investigation into the sexual abuse scandals in the Boston archdiocese that ultimately forced the resignation of Cardinal Law, and blew the lid off the scale of the abuse scandal in the States.

I won't say a lot about it here.  Go and watch it.  Seriously.  There's not many films that can make me cry these days - but this one did.  And before anyone starts - it is *not* an anti-Catholic rant.  It's remarkably restrained in a lot of ways.  You just don't want to believe what you're seeing in front of you - and all the evidence is that the truth was actually even worse.

And what is bruised he will not break.

I meant to post this last week, after this hymn was sung at Sunday Mass.  Forgot, then couldn't remember the first line to look it up.  Today at mass, the hymn book fell open to this hymn and a marker that someone had left behind.  Thank you, Lord.  I can take a hint.

The hymn was composed by the Benedictine nuns of Stanbrook Abbey, and in this Year of Mercy I found myself very moved by the third verse, which paraphrases Isaiah.


When Jesus comes to be baptized, 
He leaves the hidden years behind, 
The years of safety and of peace. 
To bear the sins of all mankind. 

The Spirit of the Lord comes down, 
Anoints the Christ to suffering, 
To preach the word, to free the bound, 
And to the mourner, comfort bring. 

He will not quench the dying flame, 
And what is bruised he will not break, 
But heal the wound injustice dealt, 
And out of death his triumph make. 

Our everlasting Father, praise, 
With Christ, his well-beloved Son, 
Who with the Spirit reigns serene, 
Untroubled Trinity in One. 

The advert that the cinemas didn't want you to see.

They didn't want you to see it in case you were "offended"

In the highly unlikely event that you are "offended" by my post, then my apologies.  Try watching it again.  You might find that it isn't so offensive after all.

For everyone else - feel free to share this post anywhere you can think of.  We'll risk the offence.  If even the ECHR says there is no human right not to be offended - http://www.lapidomedia.com/node/6209 - then I think the risk is relatively small.

If you have no idea what I'm going on about, then try Archbishop Cranmer's blog, there's a good post there about it.  http://archbishopcranmer.com/cinema-lords-prayer-ban-was-a-retroactive-policy-to-chuck-the-church-of-england/

I hope you dance

Another of those songs that could just as easily be a prayer.

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some Hellbent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance (Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along)
I hope you dance

I hope you dance (Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder)
I hope you dance (Where those years have gone?)

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

Dance

I hope you dance
I hope you dance (Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along)
I hope you dance (Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder?)

What does the Church itself say about the Eucharist

"The Eucharist, although it is the fullness of sacramental life, is not a prize for the perfect but a powerful medicine and nourishment for the weak. These convictions have pastoral consequences that we are called to consider with prudence and boldness. Frequently, we act as arbiters of grace rather than its facilitators. But the Church is not a tollhouse; it is the house of the Father, where there is a place for everyone, with all their problems" (Evangelii Gaudium, 47).

Feast day of Pope St John XXIII - a post for those on both sides depressed about the Synod.

Credit to Fr James Martin SJ for finding this quote.

St. John's Feast is celebrated on the anniversary of the opening day of the Second Vatican Council, in 1962.


"In the daily exercise of our pastoral office, we sometimes have to listen, much to our regret, to voices of persons who, though burning with zeal, are not endowed with too much sense of discretion or measure. In these modern times they can see nothing but prevarication and ruin. They say that our era, in comparison with past eras, is getting worse and they behave as though they had learned nothing from history, which is, none the less, the teacher of life. They behave as though at the time of former councils everything was a full triumph for the Christian idea and life and for proper religious liberty.
"We feel we must disagree with those prophets of gloom, who are always forecasting disaster, as though the end of the world was at hand.
"In the present order of things, Divine Providence is leading us to a new order of human relations which, by men’s own efforts and even beyond their very expectations, are directed toward the fulfillment of God’s superior and inscrutable designs. And everything, even human differences, leads to the greater good of the Church."

--Mother Church Rejoices, Opening Address of Vatican II.

Pope Francis and Laudato Si

Enough said :)